19/10/2012

a free Friday...

stay at room.. 

listening to the song..

nothing gonna change my love for u

this song suddenly prompt out..

hearing the familiar song..

u had appear in my mind..

ur sound, ur expression when singing this song..

appear simultaneously in my mind..

start my insomnia night..

oh gosh,,

i always thought that i had forget

forget about u..

who knows..

i m just lying to myself..

i had never successful to get you out of my mind..

shit.. 

damn shit...

insomnia is the most scary things after break up with u..

your face appear in my mind again and again..

i m so hopeless...

i dont know what should i do already..

i really dont wish to disturb your life..

dont wish to meet all the person who get contact with you..

i hate the feeling..

hate the eyesight when the people see me..

shit..

still cnt get over u.

wtf is it?

shit .. really holly shit..

is time for me to wake up d..

damn..

my mind was full of the song called 第九夜 after thinking about u..
a nice song by coco lee..
lol..
making me emo again..
thinking of the betraying from u..
shit...

想像心正在起飞
漫步在地中海边
再见说过了以后
我离开你很远

自以为是的从容
不想你把心放空
却忘了旅行终究得回头

我在回来时把倔强遗忘在入境的门口
再也无处可躲
满身的失落

在这第九夜
没有你的我
终于开始感到寂寞
过去这期间
我的无所谓
全都是谎言

过了第九夜
我想用一切
回到十天前的世界
想念那窗外却已天黑天黑

想像心正在起飞
漫步在地中海边
再见说过了以后
我离开你很远

自以为是的从容
不想你把心放空
却忘了旅行终究得回头

我在回来时把倔强遗忘在入境的门口
再也无处可躲
满身的失落

在这第九夜
没有你的我
终于开始感到寂寞
过去这期间
我的无所谓
全都是谎言

过了第九夜
我想用一切
回到十天前的世界
想念那窗外却已天黑天黑

在这第九夜
没有你的我
终于承认我好寂寞
过去这期间
我的无所谓
全都是谎言

过了第九夜
我终于了了解
幸福盛开在十天前
想念全世界却已天黑天黑
if possible.. 
i dont want the time go back 9 days before..
i want the time flies back to 2 years ago..
the time i just know you..
i swear i wont make the same decision ady..
i wont be with you on 31st oct..

the most regret decision i had made is promise to be together with u..
letting myself been betray..
letting myself been hurt..
letting myself suffer for so long...
i hate it!!
i never think that you would betray me..
but the truth had been clear in front of me..
making me no reason to resist it..

i so hate..
hate myself for being so stupid..
letting u play again and again..
and this would be the last time i swear..

i would never and ever allow others to come and hurt me again..
is my promise to myself..

the most wrong decision i had ever made..
i feel i m such a failure..
when the whole world tell me..
u are not a good man and ask me leaving u..
i m still stick with u..
believing you would never betray me..
and at the end..
i m the one who get betray..
get hurt..
haha...

till now i still wonder...
what make myself so love you..
and i still cnt get the correct answer..

i so regret..
regret for not listening to my dad's word..
i should listen to him and not accept u..
i thought u would be the same as the one i knw..
but i was wrong..
you are just a heartless man..
you not fit to receive all my love..
i really should wake up d lo..

sometimes, 
i also wonder..
i got tell you that i hate betrayer?
i hate the feeling of being lie by someone..
hate been betray..
i thought u know and wont do like that on me..
i thought,

i know you wont admit that u had betray me..
but if u go out and tell someone 
my ex got a new gf 
and start his new relationship not more than 1 week after we break up..
wat answer would u receive?
u really think that that was not betray?
pls..
dont be so stupid..
a man would start a relationship so fast means that he ady betray u since u haven break up lo..
no matter in action or in spirit,..
you ady betray me for so long d lo..

and while..
i still so silly believe u are really so busy..
busy till no time for me..
who knows..
the truth is u busy acc ur new gf..
and just saying i m disturbing u..
haha..
silly me to trust u..

if u really dint betray me..
u wont start a relationship so fast and telling ur new gf,
i miss u all the time..
pui..
is enough..
dont always think that i m 3 years old kid..
i m officially 21st ady..
i got my own mindset..
i just dint show to u what i truly know..
and u still thinking of wanna lie to me?
lol
pls scales about urself before talking to me pls..


and now..
if i m given a chances to go back..
you would definitely out of my life..
i would not allow you to hurt or betray me again.
you would be totally out of my life no matter how much i love u!!!
damn!!!

and now.. upload the lst pic for u..

for the end for 696 days..

is really the end d...